Volunteer Mentor Program
Program Manager:  Danielle DiMauro
203 748-4542, ext. 104
Volunteer@danburychildadvocacy.org

The Volunteer Mentor Program matches families at risk with trained volunteers who serve as role models for positive parenting and provide support, advocacy, and reinforcement of previous learning after more intensive services have completed.  Mentors maintain weekly contact with families through home visits and telephone, continuing for a year or longer.  Goals for the work may include positive discipline and parenting skills, home management skills, life skills, appropriate use of other community resources, and case management.  Mentors may continue work with goals identified in earlier work with referring agencies. This continued support has proven effective in the families’ efforts to achieve goals within the program and in future work with other community services.

Each mentor must successfully complete eight hours of training prior to being matched with a family.  The curriculum is designed to develop supportive, non-judgmental relationships, basic counseling skills, and coping strategies.  Regular supervision and good documentation help to maintain a high standard of services to families in need. 

Grandparents As Parents Support Groups (GAPS) offer psycho-education and support for grandparents raising their grandchildren.  Group leaders are trained volunteers with special interest in this population.  The number of grandparents and other relative care givers that are currently raising their grandchildren is increasing each year, emphasizing the critical need for this program.

The weekly GAPS groups provide information, support, parenting skills, advocacy, and access to community resources.  The groups are free of charge and child care is provided.  To enrich the psycho-educational component of the group monthly speakers provide current information on issues relevant to the unique needs of these families.

A Mentor’s Story

I was asked to write about my reasons for being a mentor.  I guess it’s because I care and want to make a difference.  Currently my mentee is a single mom, Laura who has a 10-year-old son, James.  I see them every Monday for about an hour.  I make sure that my meetings with them are consistent, for example, when I say I am going to be there, I keep my word.  In this way, James and Laura see that a man can be responsible and keep his promise.  James’ dad is not around much partially due to his bad habits.  Laura is a caring mom, and has a lot to carry on her shoulders.  She is unemployed and does not own a car, so she walks to take care of daily errands for James and herself.  I think she wanted help in giving James balance and a male’s point of view on how to conduct himself, as right now he is surrounded by mostly women in his life.  In talking with Laura, I think I can also help her to understand James’ point of view as a boy.

 I try to role model for Laura how she can interact with James. Through our mentoring relationship, Laura has been able to learn that James likes to play basketball, play the drums and ride his bike.

For anyone who has thought of being a mentor, I strongly recommend it. James once asked me how much I get paid to come and see him and his mom. I told him “not a cent, but the good feeling I get inside when I see them is priceless.”

“One (man) can make a difference and every (man) should try”
John F. Kennedy

Volunteer Mentors make a huge difference in the life of parents in need of support, role modeling and advocacy.  Peggy joined the volunteer mentor staff two years ago.  She works full time, has four children, and is pursuing a bachelor’s degree.  For the past year Peggy has facilitated the evening support group for grandparents raising their grandchildren.  Let me share with you the story of Linda, just one of the parents who has benefited from Peggy’s efforts.

Linda was referred to the Child Advocacy Center by the Department of Social Services.  She recently moved to the Danbury area from out of state, renting an apartment with one of her teenage daughters and a two year old grandchild, the child of Linda’s other daughter.  Linda was isolated, not connected with any services, overwhelmed, and confused.  She was seeking help with parenting skills, communication, self-esteem, stress management, and social skill management. Linda was nervous and extremely shy and skeptical about seeking assistance.

Peggy was matched with Linda and began weekly home visits to Linda’s apartment.  Gradually Linda began to trust Peggy and began to open up to her.  Peggy slowly learned about Linda’s needs and was able to give her information about local resources that could assist her in other ways.  Peggy works closely with Linda helping her to identify her strengths and encouraging and reinforcing her positive skills.  As a mentor, Peggy is an empathetic listener who is emotionally available to respond to Linda’s worries and joys.  Peggy encourages Linda in her own problem solving abilities and empowers her to face new challenges.

In the fall Peggy encouraged Linda to attend the support groups for grandparents raising their grandchildren.  Linda has become a regular participant, receiving support and information from the group.  Her granddaughter responds to positive attention from the childcare provider and from the opportunity to play with other children.  Linda feels less alone and isolated, sharing her struggles and learning to support other grandparents in the same way.

Peggy’s compassion and dedication have made a difference to Linda’s willingness to risk expressing her needs to another person.  Peggy was then able to relay that information to her supervisor who helped identify referrals to other agencies for more specific help. Peggy was able to listen without judgment which let Linda feel as though someone cared.  Peggy sees Linda’s strengths, even when it is hard for Linda to see them.  Through her engagement with the mentoring program and the grandparents’ support group Linda is less alone and isolated.  The benefits of Linda’s growing strength extend to her daughter and granddaughter as well.

One person really can make a difference.  Volunteers like Peggy make a difference every day to parents in the Danbury area, and by doing so, positively strengthen a family system.  When parents are supported and families are stable children benefit.